Monday, August 22, 2011

My Rap!!!

How good am I
Timmy's Rap

now check it, my name is Timmy, and everyone loves me
you have to listen to me cause im hot and sexy
everyone knows I live like a baller
I came to TAPA and become the top shooter
kobe ask me to be his teacher
I said im not going to cause he is a loser
everyone says that im really cool
I look like a star when I go to school
I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool
cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool
people might think im a really cocky person
but no everyone im giving you a lesson
my words might not be the best impression
but at least is better than buffett's money lesson
I seriously can fly faster than the superman
and I can rap faster than the guy call eminem
I have a pretty car that is like a rocket van
And Im sure is faster than the car of batman
talk about myself will make you feel sick
cuz my arms are strong like a hard rock stick
I can easy play you and your butt will get kick
the NBA will choose me cause got no one to pick
all these things just come out all of the sudden
and im not going to beat you by using a China weapon
all you have to do is be quiet and listen
or esle my words will be turly forgotten

19 comments:

  1. Som grammatical error at the bottom, but overall is really well written with a good sense of rhythm and humor, good job!

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  2. Pretty good and I like how it rhyme.
    Specially the line "I look like a star when I go to school" goes
    However, it is not true at all. : )

    Kidding~

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  3. Haha this is a very cool poem especially you rap it in class!! I like the part "I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool" that you actually compare yourself with a celebrity with the amount of girls you get at the pool!! This is a very funny comparison, how did you come up with that idea? Hahahahahahahaha this is great!

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  4. Man, you are awesome, way better than what I thought!
    Your"rap" got your Timmy style, and the rhythm is so cool, so Timmy-like.

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  5. It is a pretty great poem especially in the rythyms. I like the part where you say you can fly faster than superman and that you can rap faster than eminem. You probably thought a lot about this when typing it up, having such a great amount of creativity.

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  6. Winwin showed me a video of your poem rap, so coolXD
    It's creative to make this poem assignment into a rap
    And your poem has rhythm, good job!

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  8. I love the line "I can rap faster than the guy call eminem." Because it is so not true but you express this line with extreme confidence which is exactly the purpose of this rap/poem.Great job!

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  10. its a pretty good rap/poem, especially "cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool' because you express all the your feeling in your mind, thats pretty good to do that, but i know its not true and full of 'Feeling so Good about Oneself“ anyways great job timmy haha

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  11. Your poem can really rap!! It sounds like what you say about yourself everyday!! It's really awesome!!

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  12. Nice job! You are creative to put a poem into a rap, the rhythm is good and each sentence have rhyme. Some sentences are humor,not true and stupid. But I like "I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool, cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool.

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  13. "I look like a star when I go to school
    I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool
    cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool"
    everything is just a dream to you, so make your poem come true.

    Every piece of this poem is very funny, fits into your personality. Keep it up... show ur ability to the world.

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  14. OMG! When I read your poem, I can imagine that smile on your face. Dude, this is like literally by far the most boastful poem I read. Great job. My favorite lines are
    "I look like a star when I go to school
    I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool
    cuz I got more girls when we went to the pool"

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  15. I really like your creativity in this poem by comparing yourself to several celebrities like "I told Tom Cruse that he is a fool". Your positive thoughts on yourself makes this poem/rap very interesting. However, you have to watch your grammar and spelling throughout the poem (Tome Cruise). Great job in bragging about yourself!

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  16. some minor grammar mistakes but the rhyming made the poem very smooth and catchy! You truly do know how to brag about yourself, well-done!

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  17. There are some grammar mistakes, but u really describe urself very well and use rap to sing this out, I like the part that u said about Kobe and how girls come to u, good job~~

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  18. TOAST score (see Mr. Webb's blog): 30/40

    T: 6/10. Gotta clean up some of the grammar, but good start.
    O: 5/5. One of the best rap-styled poems yet.
    A: 9/10. "China weapon"? Hahaha. Not bad at all.
    S: 0/5.
    T: 10/10. Good job, dude, and way to be on performing it in class.

    Also, if anyone wants to see it... http://youtu.be/DYZypZXQa-4

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  19. the NBA will choose me cause got no one to pick. It is the dream of every basketball player of the world. It is impossible to achieve for must of us, but our dreams will never die.

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